[How a Small Gesture Changed the Course of My Life]
I often visualized myself being able to achieve more, being an inspiration to many. I was a fighter and wanted to stand up and fend for others, and had been that way from a very young age. Now I needed to fend for my rights as a young mother and protect myself and my young children. I felt trapped within myself, unable to face the fears of breaking away from abuse.
I had no self-esteem. I was born with a blood disorder called Thalassaemia. Every 15 days I needed two units of blood and was told by doctors I may never conceive. My unshakable faith saw me through all the challenges, and today I have two children.
I dwelt on my decision long, over two months, and finally said, “No more!” No more of the husband who took pleasure in belittling me, blackmailing me, and who thought threatening me every now and then was a laugh. His last words to me were, “What man will turn to look at you with your health problem?”
I felt doomed. But, enough was enough. It was time for the big move—to leave the husband, luxury “maisonette,” money, and four expensive cars. A decision I did not make easily—I went through traumatic mind games. At one point I would be all geared up and ready to go, and then I would get cold sweats and feel the fear of setting up on my own. I always wondered if I was doing the right thing.
I did all of this so I could live in peace and harmony and fulfill my duty as a responsible mother. Working hard on my self-development helped me pull through a lot of what was to come. It was a painful time for me and my little ones, but I grabbed the bull by the horns, as it’s said.
All of this made possible because of an Angel—an Angel who appeared in my time of quiet desperation and gave me the support and encouragement that I so needed to push on. I kept looking back, but my Angel always made sure I only looked forward.
Here’s how it happened: I was feeling weighed down by the duvet cover one cold November day in 2006 at 5:30 in the afternoon—yes you got it, I had not gotten out of bed yet and did not even want to try. Finally, a bolt of lightning struck me to get up and look across the street to check if my neighbor Angel was around. I dragged myself up out of bed went down stairs to a room full of clutter and half filled boxes. I just wanted to climb back into bed and under the duvet. I had to pack my boxes and move out of my apartment, pronto. It was November 5th and by November 15th I had to be out; landlord’s orders.
And guess what? I was out of blood. I had to get a flight to London on the 9th and stay until the 12th for a blood transfusion and then get back, pack, and move by November 15. This gave me only six full days to pack and move.
I needed a miracle….and, well, miracles do happen and thank God I do believe in them.
When Angel first turned up on my doorstep, he gave me the encouragement I so needed to hear at that given time. He reassured me that all will be fine, that he believed in me, found me very capable to accomplish all I set my mind on. Was this guy for real? Apparently yes, and he lived just across the street from me. He gave me his number and told me to call him any time. So, the time came for me to do just that. I looked over the balcony hoping to catch a glimpse of him somewhere and, to my disappointment, I saw only darkness, a darkness as dark as what I felt within me at that time. I turn away saddened and said, “Oh well get on with your boxes, Ange!” So I did.
Later I drank some much-needed English breakfast tea—that always soothed me—accompanied by a couple pieces of toast, which was my breakfast, lunch, and dinner because by now it was 7 p.m. Finally getting on with boxes, I bent down to place a few bits in a box and caught a flicker of light from across the balcony. Oh, the anxiety running through me. I stalled for five minutes but felt this deep down burning desire to call him. So I did. As I dialed Angel’s number my stomach was turning summersaults. As the phone rang I had flashes going through my mind. What on earth are you doing Ange? Before I had a chance to answer to myself, Angel answered his phone.
“Good Evening Ange.”
“Good Evening Angel,” I said in a hurry.
“What a pleasant surprise!”
“Hmmm, well I just looked over and saw your lights on and thought to call you. Sorry if I’m bothering you,” I said in a hurry.
Angel responded quite cool and swiftly, “You did the right thing; it’s funny but I was about to call you.”
“Really?” I replied in doubt and disbelief.
Angel said, “Yes, actually I was going to invite you for coffee. In fact, what are you doing right now?”
“I’m packing my boxes.”
Angel replied calm and collectively, “Well, have a break and come over for a coffee.”
I was in shock! I did not expect that so soon, I would be getting an invite from my tall, dark, and handsome six-foot, six-pack, and drop-dead gorgeous hunk of a Greek Navy Seal neighbor.
Off I went feeling as light as a feathered duvet. Not that weighed down feeling that I was carrying around for the months since my separation. From one minute to the next, I saw the light through the tunnel.
A cup of coffee with an Angel was the spark I needed to transform my life. Angel admired my perseverance and was there to support, encourage, and guide me. My knight in shining armor was there, appearing in my hour of need and then disappearing on his “Mission Impossible” around the Greek Islands as duty called him.
His time away suited me just fine and gave me space enough not to become too attached and to work on myself. I achieved my goal of becoming an inspiration to my children and gaining the respect of my community by allowing room in my life for change.
A true transformation: I owe this to God, knowing I was never alone and always in His grace and subject to His divine intervention; my precious children; and my beloved Angel.
[excerpt from TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE BOOK 2]